What Not To Do...
Here comes the sensible bit.
We're really looking forward to you joining us soon for University fun but just wanted to give you a quick heads up about a few of the things that will make us have to put on our serious face (and nobody likes a serious face, it's more strenuous for our faces to frown than to smile, and we just don't need the wrinkles).
Nitrous Oxide (Laughing Gas)
It's banned in Halls and you'll get an automatic £50 fine if you're caught using it (and that's only on the first time...things can escalate from there and get progressively more expensive for you). And let's be honest we're pretty likely to catch you as it's not the most discrete of things to do. We make regular patrols of halls and NOS is SO NOISY.
Drugs. Of the illegal variety.
Pretty obvious...drugs aren't only banned in halls they're also, you know, banned by society. Cue compulsory attendance at a Drugs Awareness Course or monetary fines.
Again, pretty standard. Don't smoke in halls. Or let your friends smoke. I'm sure you're used to the drill. As well as the pretty serious health implications it's also a massive fire risk. And will make you, and your halls, smell bad. There's designated smoking areas outside of your halls for you to use. If you don't there's another automatic fine system in place. Save your money!
We ask that you keep things quiet between 11.00 p.m. and 8.00 a.m. - and let's be honest you'll mainly be heading out then or sleeping so we're hoping that won't cause too many problems.
Don't cover your smoke detectors. It means they won't work and that sorta means they're pointless. Make sure fire doors aren't blocked or left open. If you do, you'll be invited to a Level 1 Disciplinary Investigation Meeting. Which no one really wants to attend (not even us).
Remember you are responsible for the behaviour of anybody who you invite or let into your accommodation - if they do any of the above, or breach your accommodation T&Cs in any other way, you'll be the one being sent an invitation to come and see us with our serious faces on or pay a fine. NOT FUN.
PHEW. *Takes off the robes of judgement and puts back on the spectacles of benevolence.
I know we're coming across as major killjoys but we just want to make sure everyone is having a fun and safe time whilst they stay with us.
All the info about your Terms and Conditions of Residence can be found here. Read and Enjoy.
See you soon!
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